Pause #1 - how life has changed so quickly! - Let's be kind!

I'm hopefully going to take time to pause over these next few weeks once in a while and blog about the strange season we're in!

Since the beginning of Lent 2020 things have changed - how life and ministry have changed.

Who at the start of 2020 would have believed we would be where we are now.

Schools closed
Ireland in a period where movements are restricted
Church buildings closed
and normal life on hold.

I write this a couple of days after the latest restrictions have come into force.

In one email I received during the past week quoted someone who had been caught up in a earthquake and said that the important thing was to get to a place of relative safely to discover what was going on.

The past week or so has for me been just that - getting ourselves into a place of safety - a place of ah.
a place to take a breath and look around at what's happening.

Church for us here in Carrigrohane Union like in so many other places across the globe has dramatically changed in its form but remains reassuringly together in its substance.

The past few weeks have allowed me to experiment with pieces of technology which are new to me - it is by no means a substitute for face to face pastoral ministry - not by a long shot. I would just love to be in Blarney, St. Peters, Inniscarra or Parish Centre with the familarity of place and people. With the smiles and banter. I long for sitting down in Centra in Blarney with a cuppa and meeting with people over a brownie.

I long to be standing in the Carraig Centre welcoming visitor and members of our congregation to the new place

but for now we're having to do stuff virtually. And what we've managed to do has been remarkable in such a short period of time. I say remarkable because we have people who have taken the time to create art, record music, send stuff to our kids, re-invent house groups to on-line communities and much more besides.

It has also involved phoning around many parishioners - and many more still to happen in the coming weeks - I'm so thankful for the technology that allows all of this to happen,

Thanks to the wonders of a couple of bits of software and some hardware which was installed in the Carraig centre and now at home here with me we've managed to bring together some stuff and produce a decent enough Sunday Morning service. Enough in order to get people joining us from both Facebook and You Tube simultaneously.

It's been remarkable to have on average 60-70 streams of live worship going out to homes all over the parish and beyond

The great thing which has helped is that people can comment on these streams - so that has been great.

There are loads of interesting links coming in from lots of people for activities - next week I hope to do a sequence of what's possible in the announcement slot.

This stuff is going to be useful in the weeks ahead - there are very much by all accounts really difficult weeks ahead for all of our communities.

My hope and prayer is that as a community we stick together, support one another in new ways.

I have no idea what is coming our way - thankfully I do not! - but for the time being I'm  taking time to pray, read, enjoy creation, time with family whether they be present in our house or virtually with us.

My prayer is for those who cannot do this at this time - for all of those essential workers in all sectors of the economy - health, food, infrastructure, government, communications, security and more - whilst we are staying at home they are being put at risk.

One piece of advice which holds true in any circumstance - let's be kind to one another - and even more so now.

Day 14 - Where is there hatred in my life?

Part of the 40days40questions series

this is another Lenten question

its about self examination and removing stuff that doesn't need to be there

The Bible is very clear

Hatred stirs up quarrels, but love covers all offenses. Proverbs 10:12

"You have heard that the law of Moses says, `Love your neighbor' and hate your enemies. But I say, love your enemy! Pray for those who persecute you! In that way, you will be acting as true children of your Father in heaven. For he gives his sunlight to both the evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and on the unjust, too." Matthew 5:43-44

With Hatred as well as a load of other things I turn as an illustration to the computer - and it's processor - I hate it when this comes up - It means I can't do the things I want to do because I don't have enough memory space to do them! 

My brain does have limited capacity! ... and my days have limited time ... and my earthly life is ultimately limited too therefore I need to be careful how I use my resources - are they going to be taken up with hatred - That certainly is an option but not a great one considering the beauty, the love and the other amazing things in this world. 

Does that make sense?  what hatred do I need to get rid off?  

Certainly that's my simplistic thought around this - its all a case of resource management in the brain ;-) 

Day 13 - where is the sin my my life

This is a series of questions for lent #40days40questions

Today's question is a typical lenten question - identifying where sin is is only the first step to getting rid of it.

Where do we slip up - time after time, after time

This calls for an honesty about our actions, inactions, thoughts, words

What needs to change?

We can often times let things slip - don't have enough time, that would be too radical a shift right now or whatever it may be

But if it is not good, if it is hurting you, others or generally needs to go - why not identify it and deal with it.

some info about the church of Ireland's understanding on repentance and forgiveness can be found here https://www.ireland.anglican.org/our-faith/apck/repentance-forgiveness

Day 12- What do I need to let go of?

This is part of the Lenten series #40days40questions 

What do we need to let go of? 

When I sat down to think this morning about this question the above song came to mind for obvious reasons. 

Yes there is emotional stuff - years of bottling stuff in comes to mind, stuff that clogs our mind when you think of this song but when I origninally wrote the question I was thinking more of the practical - are there things that we simply need to get rid of - physically - stuff that's been sitting around and we just simply don't need any more. 

On one Blog I read this 

Action #1: Perform a Clutter Bust (10-45 minutes)
This is hands-down the best way to tidy and declutter a space in a short period of time. You can apply it to just one room at a time (strongly recommended), or if you’re feeling ambitious or particularly over-run with clutter – tackle all the main areas of the home.
Whatever you choose – speed is the key here.
How to clutter-bust your home:

1. Grab an empty laundry basket.
2. Choose a room to begin.
3. Moving quickly – pick up each and every item in that room that does not belong, or is out of place. Place them in the laundry basket.
4. Every single thing.
5. Once full, empty the contents of the laundry basket on the dining table or a clear space on the floor.
6. Sort items into piles – according to where they belong, as well as a pile for rubbish/donations/items that do not belong to you.
7. Working through one pile at a time, take every item back to its rightful place.
8. Complete for each pile and whenever you feel the clutter begin to take over your home. - https://slowyourhome.com/21-quick-actions-simplify-life/ 

 We do that physically - and let things go - I do think it's important start - but there are other actions too that might help

A great book I came across a few years back - Ordering your Private world each section of that book mentions something very practical

the introduction states:

Memo to the Disorganized: “If my private world is in order, it will be because I am convinced that the inner world of the spiritual must govern the outer world of activity.” (p. 10) 

Memo to the Disorganized: “If my private world is in order, it will be because I make a daily choice to monitor it’s state of orderliness”. (p. 18)

In terms of orderliness and also freeing up space - what do I need to let go of today?

Day 11 - Who do I need to show love to today?

Part of the 40 days 40 questions series on this Blog


This question is who needs my love today?

There are obvious answers to this - nearest and dearest - and rightly so

And then there are less obvious ones too - those who you will come in contact with today ... who could you show love to today who might need a listening ear, a bit of time, an unexpected gift.

Over the past few years I have dipped in and out of a book 5 Love Languages - do you know what your primary love language is and what the language of the person you are closest to is? what others about you are?

The theory in this book is that everyone has a primary & secondary love language - right from childhood onwards and we experience as well as give love in one of these 5 ways. 

we might be clearly (to us) showing love but actually the other person doesn't understand that.  For example a gift giver might always be giving presents but actually the receiver really wants to do is sit down and have some quality time with the person. 

Does that make sense? 

It works in Child / Parent relationships, in spouses, in dating and also to a lesser extent in others too. 

a Summary of this might be something like : 

Day 10 - How is my Witness?

This is another strangely worded question

but it asks a question we don't normally ask

by my witness - I am thinking about how others see me, about the integrity of being a Christ Follower - is the message of Christ and my actions towards those I come in contact with compatible and also are there areas I need to work on?

The Holy Communion service begins with a reminder of the great commandment

Love God, Love neighbour

That is a summary of the Law.

When we look back many centuries - Christians struggle with bringing these things together but when they do - there is great things that can be done. Of course the opposite is true when we love God so much but fail to love neighbour there is great zeal yes but huge problems could prevail.

or when we love people but fail to live up to God's standards in other areas there is great pain caused.

Therefore this is very much a lenten question

Where is the dissonance between what I say I believe and what I actually do with those beliefs?

Does that make sense?


I suppose the other thing is that a witness is only useful when they testify - when they say what they have seen, heard, experienced. When was the last time you've done that? It takes courage and determination to do that!

Day 9 - Who do I need to talk to about God?

Day 9 - in a series of questions for Lent. 

Todays question has been left purposefully vague.

Why would I want to talk to anyone about God? you might ask

What would the purpose of this talk be?

I raise the question because we talk about all sorts of things to all sorts of people but sometimes we leave important things unsaid so often. We'll talk about the weather, the win, the loss of our team but do we talk about ultimate issues with those we come in contact with?

When talking about God sometimes we might feel ill equipped or what happens if they ask a question I don't know the answer to ... or whatever else.

The above is presuming that we have have a message to communicate.

But what if we're the one with the questions, the doubts etc etc

Why not think about what we might be wanting communicate - what we might want to share with someone else.

I believe there is a need today to be more open about God Talk - us talking about God - about our beliefs, our struggles, our grapplings - There's a word for that Theo-logy

This could be pastoral, it could be evangelism (the sharing of the good news), it could be in debate, it could be preaching, it could be simply sharing our story,  it could be us wanting to grow in faith, it could be all sorts of other possibilities.

Who do I need to talk to about God today?

Day 8- Where is the space in my diary for God?

This is a question which may be really interesting for me right now.

In a season where there are lots of busyness around, lots of competing priorities - where is the quiet space?

Does God time get squeezed? - where is the retreat space.

Space for God could include:

quiet times in the mornings
time to thank him at meals
a prayer before bed
Sunday Mornings at church in community with others


But it also could be a quiet day away
Time to enjoy creation on a walk
Time out with him


It could also be time with a mentor, spiritual director, good friend, supervisor - putting priorities in place.
It could be time listening to a worship song, a small group.

Basically a time where we re-connect with our Heavenly father.

Lent is a great time to ask these question, to put the important things in place.

I say this as no expert on these things at all.

Where is the space?

The Jar, Golf Balls And The Coffee

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the jar… and the coffee…

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar.He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full.They agreed it was.The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the Jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous “yes.”

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.”Now,” said the professor, as the laughter subsided, “I want you to recognise that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things, the things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter. Your job, your house, and your car. The sand is everything else. The small stuff.

If you put the sand into the jar first,” he continued, “there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the House and wash the car. Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter.Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented

The professor smiled. “I’m glad you asked. It just goes to show You that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.”

And I would as well add to it:

Please, make sure to make a time to have a cup of coffee with Yourself sometimes:)

Day 7 - What am I responsible for?

This is a question which I have been puzzling over ... It's a question which is a factual one but it is also one which could have a never ending answer ... where do I stop?!

In trying to figure this out I think there are more than a few areas where I have responsibility

Myself - I'm responsible for my body, mind and spirit - my actions, my thoughts and my spiritual well being

As a husband

As a son and brother  to my wider family

As a Child of God  - The commitments I have made in faith - Baptismal, Confirmation and Ordination vows

The work I do - I have responsibilities I have committed to as part of that work.

As a leader - who am I responsible for and to - and what am I doing with that responsibility?

The tasks I have agreed to do in the wider community - locally and nationally.

As a citizen of this country - I have responsibilities - to pay my taxes, to abide by the laws of the land

As a human being - I have responsibilities to look after others and their rights as well as protecting the world


We are responsible people - Are there particular responsibilities that you need to give up - things that are taking up to much of your time that you need to say no to in order to be responsible in other areas right now?

What responsibilities need to increase now - what do you need to give a bit more time to in this season of life?

What's your vision for life? - What investment of responsibilities do you need to make in this season?


Another way to answer this is to say

1. I Am Responsible For My Body
2. I Am Responsible For My Words
3. I Am Responsible for My Thoughts
4. I Am Responsible for My Emotions
5. I Am Responsible for My Behavior

all of us are - and we need to remember that in any given situation we can build ourselves and others up or tear down using our body, our words, our thought patterns, our emotions and our behaviour.

How am I using my responsibility today for Good?

Day 6- Who do I need to forgive?

Today is day 6 of a series of 40 questions for Lent 

Today we're considering the issue of forgiving someone. I wonder who or what situation comes to mind when you sit down and think about this question. maybe someone close or even someone you don't know. It could be a small thing or it could be ultimate issue thing. It could have happened to you half an hour ago or waaaay back or anywhere in between.

So what exactly is forgiveness? Forgiveness is defined by some as giving up my right to hurt you, for hurting me. Forgiveness says I do not have to hear you say I am sorry in order for me to move forward with my life. Forgiveness is designed to set the victim free. It has nothing to do with the offender.

Many question if we forgive are we also encouraged to forget? Not so much. If we give it a biblical perspective when Jesus died on the cross to save our sins he called out to God asking him to “forgive them for they know not what they do”. Did that take Jesus off the cross. No. The same works with forgiveness here on earth today. Just because you forgive someone does not mean you are condoning their actions nor does it mean you think that person had the right to hurt you.  

So why should you forgive you may ask? Let me offer a few reasons why I personally believe one should forgive:

• It sets you free

• It helps you move forward with your life

• It begins your healing process

• It removes the anger and malice from your heart

• You’re no longer giving someone else authority over your mind and heart

• You’ll will have a peace of mind

• You have the power to forgive

• Forgiveness is the best revenge

• Forgiveness is one of life’s greatest teachers

• Forgiveness helps us release the victim mentality

https://www.huffpost.com

In all of this I suppose ultimately there is something really important - We forgive because we have been forgiven. I would find it extremely hard to pray the simplest of prayers if I was not living in an attitude of forgiveness - forgive us our tresspasses as we FORGIVE those who trespass against us.

What are you holding on to today? - could today be the day when you release that person, that situation over to God and forgive them for the hurt and the wrong they have done to you

Dear Lord, I thank You for the power of forgiveness, and I choose to forgive everyone who has hurt me. Help me set [name anyone who has offended you] free and release them to You [Romans 12:19]. Help me bless those who have hurt me [Romans 12:14]. Help me walk in righteousness, peace, and joy, demonstrating Your life here on earth. I choose to be kind and compassionate, forgiving others, just as You forgave me [Ephesians 4:32]. In Jesus’ name, amen.- Debbie Przybylski https://www.crosswalk.com/faith/prayer/4-prayers-for-forgiveness-for-sin-healing-and-others.html  

In preparing this I came across this contemporary song

It's the hardest thing to give away And the last thing on your mind today It always goes to those who don't deserve It's the opposite of how you feel When the pain they caused is just too real It takes everything you have to say the word... Forgiveness Forgiveness It flies in the face of all your pride It moves away the mad inside It's always anger's own worst enemy Even when the jury and the judge Say you gotta right to hold a grudge It's the whisper in your ear saying 'set it free' Forgiveness, Forgiveness Forgiveness, Forgiveness Show me how to love the unlovable Show me how to reach the unreachable Help me now to do the impossible Forgiveness, Forgiveness Help me now to do the impossible Forgiveness It'll clear the bitterness away It can even set a prisoner free There is no end to what its power can do So let it go and be amazed By what you see through eyes of grace The prisoner that it really frees is you Forgiveness, Forgiveness Forgiveness, Forgiveness Show me how to love the unlovable Show me how to reach the unreachable Help me now to do the impossible Forgiveness I want to finally set it free So show me how to see what Your mercy sees Help me now to give what You gave to me Forgiveness, Forgiveness Forgiveness, Forgiveness Forgiveness 

Day 5 - What do I need to confess to God?

This is part of a 40 day series of questions for Lent 2020 

At the beginning of all of the services we hold, or at some other point in the service we confess to God those things that we have done - This is not simply for the sake of it, or to say something.

In talking about confession with parishioners so often people have some sort of issue with it due to structures of confessional or whatever -  but I would go back to the Bible and think on passages such as the prodigal son - and the love sick father - he wants his child to return - gives him the inheritance, the freedom but eventually the child comes to his senses.

In the Churches we usually something like this:

Almighty and most merciful Father, we have wandered and strayed from your ways like lost sheep. We have followed too much the devices and desires of our own hearts. We have offended against your holy laws. We have left undone those things that we ought to have done; and we have done those things that we ought not to have done; and there is no health in us. But you, O Lord, have mercy upon us sinners. Spare those who confess their faults. Restore those who are penitent, according to your promises declared to mankind in Christ Jesus our Lord. And grant, O most merciful Father, for his sake, that we may live a disciplined, righteous and godly life, to the glory of your holy name.
Amen.

To me this bit in the middle is really important

We have followed too much the devices and desiresof our own hearts. 

 so often the desires of our own hearts have a warped sense of what would make us happy - which is why we do need to take care of our heart. and Identify those things within us that could lead us into the sin which so easily entangles us.

We have offended against your holy laws.

In Scripture there a clearly things which are wrong - eg looking simply at the 10 commandments ... there's loads of things there that we would do well to live our lives by but there are others too.

We have left undone those thingsthat we ought to have done;

Sins of omission - those things we haven't done which we should have done

and we have done those thingsthat we ought not to have done; 

Sins of commission - those things we have done - that we really shouldn't have done.


The great news - the greatest news is that by faith, through the cross of Christ - sin can be dealt with - yes there might be effects which need to be worked on but


In form one of Morning & Evening Prayer  the priest prays this prayer

Almighty God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who desireth not the death of a sinner, but rather that he may turn from his wickedness, and live; and hath given power, and commandment, to his Ministers, to declare and pronounce to his people, being penitent, the Absolution and Remission of their sins: He pardoneth and absolveth all them that truly repent, and unfeignedly believe his holy Gospel. Wherefore let us beseech him to grant us true repentance, and his Holy Spirit, that those things may please him which we do at this present; and that the rest of our life hereafter may be pure and holy; so that at the last we may come to his eternal joy; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Basically there is an assurance of sins forgiven and then a looking forward.

Today's question is simple but profound

what do I need to confess - are there things you need to sort out with God - what attitudes or actions or inactions do you need to confess - to repent of and to turn away from?

and as a result what do you need to do, to get rid of ...

Know that he is a kind and loving God who will forgive who will give you grace to do just that.